My Ascension Diary - Part 12

My Fourth (And Last!!!) Twin Arrives. Universe, Not Again?????

May 2016 – My Fourth Twin Arrives

My fourth twin arrived 17 months later. He was 6 years older than me. He was married. Yes, this one was different. He would last for years, weaving in and out of my life. At this point, I knew he was twin. The twin energy was flowing through him and I was consciousness enough to see it. I would like to say that helped. Maybe on some level it did but it was still a roller coaster of emotion. Twins make us hope and wish for a certain outcome. Many people would say that is the kiss of death. I tend to agree with them.

Hoping and wishing is disempowering energy. It takes us out of the present moment. We start looking for another moment where things could be different. Where there are no obstacles in the way. We don’t understand at the time the obstacles are there for a reason. They are assisting us from making the same mistakes again. Obstacles are there when things are not aligned. A lesson I would learn through many years with my last twin.

How did I know this would be my last twin? Because I was done. No more compromising for twins. I would utilize this experience to clear program. I was determined. Sure, the first few years of this relationship I got caught up in the hoping and wishing. But by 2019, I had cleared enough within myself to find clarity. It didn’t mean I had no feelings left for him. I did. I still was open to exploring a relationship with him. I would constantly look at the timelines, looking for one that was aligned. Problem was for the first few years, none of them were.

When I say he was different, that is an understatement. He was handsome, sorta famous and rich. Everyone wanted to be around him. We meet Memorial Day weekend in 2016. We had a good time together. It was only for a few hours but it was impactful. At the time, I didn’t know he was married. I found out a few days later. That is when our cosmic dance began.

I would see him roughly every six months from a far. We would have no contact. Every time I would see him my heart would skip a beat. It became a game after a while, when would he pop up? I started to decode my reality, looking for the markers that meant he would make another appearance. My friends would know him only as “My Crush.” I would find out later that his friends would only know me as “The Fortune Teller.”

If I said we lived in two different worlds, that would be an understatement. He was rich and did all the things that money gave him. I wasn’t. He brought up more self-worth issues than ever before. Why would someone like him want me? It seemed silly. A Cinderella Story that was meant for the big screen. Yes, I saw this stuff happen all the time. But there was still a part of me that didn’t believe my ship could ever come in.

Even though in this reality we had little to no interaction, my dream world was full of him. I had over 150 dreams of him by 2018. I saw so many realities where we worked together. In some realities we were a couple. Maybe in some I was a mistress. This was the first time I opened up to the concept of other dimensional realities. I started to understand that there was not just one. I saw our relationship years before we actually became friends. In the early years, I understood our potential through dreams. That was I all I had.

After a while, I started to doubt that anything would ever get off the ground. Then I shifted. May 2018 he meet again. In almost the exact same spot as before. We once again enjoyed each other’s company. If he remembered our first meeting 2 years prior, he never mentioned it. I didn’t either. It seemed pointless. I learned that bringing up old timelines would recreate them. That timeline was gone. It was now time for a new one.

I still could not say whether that meeting ended the old timeline or teed up the next one. My guess is both. It would be another six months before I would see him again. This time because my universe pushed me to go to a bar he frequented. It was time for me to insert myself into his life. On a soul level, I had made that agreement. I was to show him a different way, “wake him up.” My human didn’t want to go. This place felt out of my league. I didn’t think I would belong there. But It didn’t matter. It was time to get over myself and put on my big girl pants. I was at a point where I understood my soul agreements. I had to honor them.

And honor it I did. In the fall of 2018, I made my debut at his hang out. I knew all I had to do was be there. That was it. Our energy fields needed to be around each other. We both needed that. It was time for that. A conversation wasn’t necessary. Normally, we were both so nervous when we talked to each other it was a waste of energy. I would describe us as babbling teenagers. At some points, I figured teenagers could do a better job at a conversation then we did.

I had to put myself there and he would do the rest. He honored his soul agreement too. He would always find me. We would talk briefly. He had family obligations and I was not in those realities. But over the next year, we would become friends. He was illusive with his energy. I always expected the unexpected from him. He would never do what I thought he would do. He would never do what I wanted him to do.

We had a strong attraction to each other but we were friends. That was what it was. And I look back now and know that was for the best. It forced us to build a foundation. He liked being around me and I liked being around him. It was hard for my human to see him with his family and friends. It’s not that I didn’t want him to be happy. I did. But sometimes it made me feel lonely. I felt separate from them. That year I felt separate from everyone. It was as if I was in another dimension. In a way, I was. He was not in it. At that point in his life, he did not want to be in it.