My Ascension Diary - Part 20

I Felt My Universe Had Left Me Stranded With This Job.

This was a time in my life where I wanted to be accepted. I wanted to feel important. After my third twin left, I had the feeling that no one would ever want me. This job would energetically reflect that back at me. I only resonated with a few people there. I wasn’t part of any crowd, though I wanted to be. This was my universes way of stripping down my identities. I wasn’t supposed to validate myself through a title anymore. I had to find it within. The problem I had was there was so much sadness within. I didn’t like going inside.

As I progressed in my journey the job began to change. By the middle of 2015, I could work from home one day a week. That at least aided me with the driving issue. It also showed me I was moving into another phase. By the middle of 2016, I would be told to stay home for months at a time. I still had little to do but at least I didn’t have to drive there to do it.

Yes, I still got my full salary. In fact, I got bonuses. This pay check kept my financial bus rolling. My ego hated all the alone time. I felt isolated from the world. But this job supported me as I went through my deepest clearings. It was as if I had a husband to support me while I lost my mind. I felt many times like I had lost my mind.

I wanted to be around people but I didn’t it. In those days, I had a hard time holding my energetic field while around other people. I thought about getting a new job but there was a part of me that didn’t want that either. By 2017, I worked from home 90% of the time. The workload decreased every year. The reality was slowly fading away. Every year I thought it would end. This job lingered on for years.

There were so MANY times where I wanted to get another job. My ego wanted to contribute again and make a difference. But there was a stronger part of me that said stay the course. This job was there for a reason. It allowed me to create my next realities, which would be my soul purposes. I established The Art of Intuition, in March of 2017. I wrote articles and workshops. I did videos. I was writing the next chapter of my life. All I had to do was be on call when my boss needed me. Which might be 5 hours a month and the rest of the time was mine.

Let’s talk about my boss. We might not have started off best buddies. Through the years our relationship had challenges but that was the roles we would play. The more discordant the job became the less and less I had to experience it. On some level, my boss knew that. She would support me over our last few years together. I would look at her through different lenses as time passed. By August of 2019, I would appreciate her for fulfilling her soul contract to me. She was to support me financially during that stage of my process. That was her role. When that stage of my journey was complete, the job would end.

It did end. There was a part of me that was so happy. I was moving on. After a while the job had felt like purgatory. I thought it would never be over. Then it was in a blink of an eye. August 2019, the company eliminated the position and I was free. My team took me to lunch and I hugged my boss. Although this phase of my life took many twists and turns, it ended in its highest place.

Now I mention the part of me that was happy. Did I mention the part of me that was scared? This job had paid 85% of the bills. This job had paid the mortgage. The company I had created was not bringing in any money. After longing to be free, I was scared out of mind. I started scanning websites for jobs. I would work through that fear through the next year. Each time the financial situation would get worse, it would bring up another layer of fear. But I would stay the course and not get another finance job. That part of my life was over. I had to accept that.

We never appreciate what we have. That was a lesson I would learn repeatedly. For the four years I had that job, I asked every night for it to end. I pictured myself riding off into the sunset with my business making millions of dollars every year. The fact was I still had so much programming left to clear. I still lived in lack programming. The depths of it I would not even see till a year later. I was still in my own way. Yes, my business would start to get some traction but not enough to pay the bills. I was heading for a complete financial reset.

I would look back at the job and remember it fondly. I sometimes wished I was back there and not having to worry about the mortgage payment. I wished I would have appreciated it more. That is the way of our human. We don’t know what we had till it is gone. I understood why it had to end. I had so many expectations on the next phase of my journey. Another lesson I would learn. The soul doesn’t expect anything, our human does.

The next phase for me was nothing but rough financially. That was my fault. I didn’t want to change my distorted views about money. I had to take the rough road on that one. I had to break completely. That was the path I choose. Sure, I had pasted up multiple opportunities to get my financial life on track over the years. I had wasted more money then I could count. There was no point on dwelling on that now. I had to find my way through my reset. I had to trust that much.

But this was rough. ***** 2026 Annette Here *****As I look back on the end of 2018 and the complete collapse that was about to occur in 2019, part of me is glad I was still so confused about what soul aligned realities would be. My human would not do well with what was about to occur. I said at the start this story could be a horror movie at times, well 2019 was about to kick that off.